Monday 28 July 2014

Untaken photograph...


   Saturday morning. Bright light from the window woke me up. There was still very early as the street was relatively quite.  I can't sleep too long in a new places anyway, especially while traveling. It's probably due to all excitement and willingness to know the place, to feel it.
  I went out. Fresh, cold winter air filled my lungs. Beautiful sunny day. I turned right to Friedrichstraße and went down the street, crossed the bridge and turned right again walking along Spree River. Just wanted to go straight ahead without any specific plan, absorb the city... 
  City was waking up. Almost empty streets, very few cars and lovely aroma of coffee here and there. I crossed the bridge again getting back to the other side of the river. Trusting only my senses I ended up at Alexanderplatz. Perfect place. Place which still reminds me old East Berlin. I fill strange pleasure being surrounded by such structures from few decades back. Massive, full of pride buildings. Never have such impression walking through these new glassy structures... they don't exist for me anymore...

  Coffee... I was a bit surprised that I survived so long without it. I crossed already very busy Karl-Liebknecht-Straße. The time flies. More people, more cars on the street... 
Amazing how fast morning quietness turning into constant noise... All of it confuses me a lot. Usually I am looking subconsciously for desolation and tranquility. That's why early morning is the best time for a walk. On the other hand I wouldn't be able to survive without such everyday noise and all consequences comes with it. I know It's a bit bizarre but I found the way how to deal with it.
... It is like I am trying to build sound proof translucent wall around me which also protects me agains all these crowds. I am staying, observing, recording everything in my head. 

I feel like invisible.

  Coffee ... I just followed the aroma. I've immediately entered into one of these huge concrete building going along the street. I spotted cafe on my right hand side. Doors opens. Bright space. A few square tables with plastic covers on them. There was nobody except two mid age ladies in white aprons behind old counter. I was looking for a while and couldn't believe. Time in this place has stopped about 30 years ago. I could feel how real this place is...The right time, the right place. I got my coffee and sat down behind one of mentioned tables in the corner.

In that moment I realised that I am not alone. On the other side, a few tables away there was this elderly man drinking his tea from a glass. 65 maybe 70 years old, checkered shirt. He was siting straight, head supported by both hands, looking at street behind the window. He almost did not move. 
Something magical was in this so normal scene. I obviously felt like watching film. 
What he was thinking about? 
Why he was not moving? 
I didn't do anything. I don't know what I could do at all except watching it...
No idea how long it took... I am sure it was long enough as I lost completely contact with reality. My imagination was buzzing... I was like hypnotized. Simple scene but at the same time so engaging.

Maybe this man was also invisible ...

I went out. Busy street, lots of people around and image of this man and his tea in my head...

*************

  No, I did not take a photograph even if it was so perfectly and naturally staged ... Why?
It was over 5 years ago. Yes...it is still in my head since then but just recently I realised that there was a reason for that. 
  Every single element of this episode - the time, place, emotions and so on – was probably too complex to close it into one single frame. I had to 'record' several layers of this particular moment in my head using only my eyes and senses and place them together creating multiexposure-like image...very reach, very realistic and long lasting...
  Some moments in our life better to remember exactly in that way. It become more realistic even if after years it may be actually far from the reality ...